This week members of my family suffered a very unexpected loss. My sister-in-law’s step father took a fall and suffered severe head trauma. His death was instantaneous and it really came as a shock to everyone.
Ray Hachey was 6 days shy of his 68th birthday.
In talking with my brother and his family, everyone seemed numb. How can someone be so alive the day before, celebrating Father’s Day, laughing and joking and holding onto his granddaughter, and within hours he is gone?
Death can be long and slow for some, or instantaneous for others. It can be deliberate, or a cruel twist of fate.
Ray was a wonderful caring man. Quietly in the background making sure everyone around him was happy. He was a family man and adored spending time with my brother and his family and they adored spending time with him.
In his younger years, Ray was in the navy and was incredibly proud of the work he did there. Later in life he loved spending time at his home in Cambridge, Ontario and worked on his gardens and deck. He took pride in his work and absolutely adored his partner Louise. They cared for each other, and it was evident whenever they were around each other.
Something about the loss of Ray has hit me hard. It is the entire idea of life and loss. Here one day, gone the next. This hits home for me how much it means to tell those you love how you feel, to let go of the things that hurt you, and to really look inwards toward what you really want in your life.
I know Ray spent his last day doing something he loved. He was surrounded by family in his back yard. He laughed, he smiled, he shared stories. His fall was sudden, but his life was lived.
I hope when my time comes, people can say the same for me. “Her life was lived.”
All the best to you Ray. Guess we’ll catch you on the flip side.
“To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die.”
~ Thomas Campbell
UPDATE: A celebration of Ray’s life will take place at his home in Cambridge Friday June 20, 2014 anytime after 2pm. As per Ray’s wishes, no formal funeral has been arranged as he would like everyone to have a party in his honour.